And so, I just returned home. Just have a look at my heavy eyebags and red nose. I was from a ride with Akai's parents. Ok, went to hys grndma's crib in the middle of the night.

Things have been going on between me and boyfie, lately.

The tiff, the changes and the distance. Its not getting any better, it turned out to be worst. Its 6 weeks to our engagement and now, i dun evn knoe how to phrase it. A DISASTER? err... SERIOUS. NO IDEA.

Lets get things straight. Ive had a huge argument with hys friend, Farhan. AGAIN!

And outta sudden, akai was all different.

Crap, it was just a week ago when he asked me if he cud return baq to my crib, and my answer was simple, NO. reason, i was unhappy still.

Yes, I got myself carried away thinking of that jander.

But, again, they are mere friends. And i hope, its clear enough.

Akai has a serious problem answering calls, and replying messages nowadays. Not only mine, but everyone. Hys mum told me he sounded real down.

I knoe, my sarcasms hurt hym alot. and i cnt blame hymm. Im the kinda person who will shoot out all the negativity and blames when im raged.

Great, now he merajoq and he doesnt even wanna hear my name.

He doesnt even wanna take my calls anymore. Not only that, he even said, he cared nothing about the engagement = US!

Something is SERIOUSLY not right ok, because, we were ok. and suddenly, BOOM! he hates me.

Dun u think its funny? all rite, hys mum told me to hold on. and she still wanna clarify things with that son of hers. and i should thank akai's family and mama for all the support.

I am still drowned and drained.

Back in my mind, I dun want thys engagement but here in my heart, "BABY, I LOVE U SOO MUCH."

Everyone told me to gyve myself a time-out.

I can't. Ive been having sleepless nytes and crying. FOR A GUY? omg.

sighs.

Readers, pray hard for me ok. Trust me, deep within, i knoe, my baby will come baq to hys senses and i knoe, there must be something bothering hym.

The very 1st minute, we were happy and for the next, it was tears, anger and hatred.

Its funny huh? at first, it was me who felt the hatred. and now.. its hym..

Dun wanna be superstitious. But baby, i dun even knoe, where are u leading us.

U said U missed me? and now?

AKAI, IF YOU'RE READING THYS, REMEMBER..

Akai : Bella... naq qener cross qer?

Bella : Taqlar.. Last ey??

Akai ; CUTE SEH bella. buat lgy! *Kisses me on the forehead.

im out for now.

SERIOUSLY, NOT IN THE MOOD FOR ANYTHING.

bella.